Grief and Loss Counseling

Flying is an emotional experience

Do you remember what it was like the first time you flew in an airplane? The experience was likely a mixture of exhilaration, wonder, power and fear. Our heart raced, adrenaline kicked in, and it may have felt surreal.

The physiological changes you noticed may have been confusing – is this worry or something else?

For some of us, it wasn’t easy to tease out precisely what was going on because of the complexity of body sensations and emotions.

One thing for sure is that you were not in control of the plane. You may have wanted to fight with the emotions that surfaced or bury them.

Loss of control can accompany grief

Experiencing grief after loss has some things in common with flying, especially the wonder, power, fear, and surreal aspects.

Experiencing grief can sometimes be all-consuming, even thunderous – creating fear of an unknown future or a future without the person or thing we’ve lost.

Physiological changes emerge and can disturb equilibrium and sense of self. You may experience an extra pounding of your heart, queasiness, or throbbing headaches. You may wish to push away or run from these changes, or you may want to surrender.

Where do you turn for support? How do you find the inner and outer resources needed for strength and levity?

Can’t see a way out

If you find it difficult to see a way out of the heartache and misery of loss, it’s understandable. Depending on the nature of your relationship to the deceased, it can take a long time to begin to find your equilibrium again.

For now, learning to carefully and lovingly become attuned to your needs may be the most significant thing you can do right now.

Build space to carry loss

The goal is to recover the space to allow you to carry the loss.

What does this mean?

You want to be able to carry loss, make room for it, and at the same time not create additional suffering.

When you feel saddled and burdened by emotions to the point that you can no longer steward your life, it’s time to reach out.

Integrating loss and moving forward

Counseling can feel abstract and mysterious.

The focus is on your experience – how you sort through, find connection, make meaning, lose hope, take inventory, grapple with conflicting emotions, and find courage.

I will help you process the event story as well as the back story of your relationship with the one who died.

We will spend time looking at how you understand and make sense of loss, and ways to integrate it into your life and carry it forward.

You don’t have to do this alone

Your world of meaning has been shaken if not shattered by loss. It can be a particularly lonely place.

The goal is to deepen self-understanding and your capacity for self-reflection and self-compassion.

I see myself as your guide, working to stay a half step in front of you while simultaneously being led by you.

You have what you need

You have everything you need. The task is to help you find increased stamina and resourcefulness, as well as uncover the parts of yourself that haven’t been so accessible.

By gaining additional awareness and being patient, your journey will lead to other discoveries as momentum builds.

Welcome to the sacred person that you are.

Let me help you work with the emotional landscape of your loss today.